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why?
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Mar. 14th, 2007 @ 06:07 pm
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why does it hurt me so?
why do i think of him so much?
why did we have to have a break?
love stinks if it has to hurt so much!
what hurts more is that he was my crush!
WHY this pain in my heart? WHY?Current Mood:  depressed Current Music: simpsons |
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this good hearted boy will be missed. why so young and was in so much pain? you would have to question about your own life.Current Mood: sad |
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hey
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Aug. 27th, 2006 @ 11:58 pm
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i'm alive yes. lol. i miss everyone who still reads this. sorry heidi and heather but i remembered that your b-day was the 19th so happy belated b-day. love you mucho, and no i did not read anything that said your b-day on it.Current Mood:  stressed |
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Mar. 7th, 2006 @ 08:25 pm
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ok i'm sick with mono/strep thoart/lymph nodes swollen nasty style.... so yea i have been having fever on ans off. i got a shot on my ass cuz of it. fuckin' shot hurt plus i got cold sweat cuz i had nothing to eat this morning. so my sugar went down. which really sucked a lot of ass cuz i hate with a passion when that happens to me. luckly my mom was there to fan me and lift up my shirt i was sweating like animal. so yea i feel like shit!!Current Mood: crappy Current Music: american idol |
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Feb. 15th, 2006 @ 12:03 am
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i never knew i can like this day!
i got orange roses!
a halmark card!
and a B-E-A-U-TIFUL ring!
i love him!Current Mood:  giddy Current Music: silence |
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ok let me breathe. :: deep breathe:: ok where should i begin.
saturday the 21 was made official for him and i. :)
sunday this beautiful person tells me he loves me. did i have a heart attack...... yes i did. and yes i do love him back. ::tear::
omg!
Jan. 23rd, 2006 @ 12:10 am
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lets see where i can start to update... at this current moment i , cookie monster, am in a relationship. weird to hear that isn't it. cuz i'm not one to say things about guys being with me for such a long time cuz the only ones i think i have talked about have only been wanting one thing from me.... well this guy is meaning a lot to me lately. i don't kno why.. we a clickin' so well that i think weird. like finally is it my time to have someone who will care about me and miss me when i don't see him that day or that would even miss me if he didn't get to say goodnight to me one night. well so far exactly thats whats been happening. we are very comfortable with each other. that being comfortable with each other went pretty fast cuz sometimes it takes "others" (weird people) time before they open up or able to eat in front of one another. it only took us nothin' actually cuz he took me to starbucks on our first outing together. yes yes i kno that boy has me spoiled with that shit. lol. wat can i say he is my poopie. its weird cuz i think about him through out the day. not every second of the minute and every minute of the hour not like that. but like when shit comes out in joke or other things that we have done together that i can put in refrence to what ever the other person is talkin' about, i have a smile on my face cuz he at times pops up in my head. i kno you might me sayin aww cookie. but i'm already doing the aww for you. cuz i also feel the aww everytime that i am with him or when he tells me that he misses me. when he tells me that i want to hug him, but he usually tells me that on the phone when he is at work and or he tells me that when we are about to leave in the car he tells me " baby i missed you today." i do my aww and have a smile on my face that hurts because i can't stop smiling. he makes me feel good about myself. yea he compliments me and stuff but not like that. more like he cares on what i have to say about it, why that is that and not like this, just things like that. he loves my opinion on a subject he loves that i can talk like a person and not no stupid/airhead/moron type of a girl. i do have my baby talk but thats when i feelin' silly (which is 75% of the time) and stuff but i no when to act mature when the time is neccessary... so yea thats what new with me at the moment. and i'm also workin' like a whore in victoria's secret in westland mall. which is a beautiful store which i think all the stores in westland is shity except for macy's, sears, bath and body works, pac sun, and charllet russe. lol. but yea workin' like a whore and comin' out and smellin' like one cuz of the damn splashes and perfumes. lol. i miss the ones that i haven't seen in the longest like nat, vanise, luis, jayson, and my bed.
i wish all of you the best in these holidays and that you get what you want for christmas. love you!
Dec. 21st, 2005 @ 02:41 pm
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ok where do i begin:
- cookie is no longer depressed of not having someone.
- i have someone callin' me to see how i'm doin' and wanting to see me to hang out even if its for 5 minutes.
- i miss everyone.
- i'm workin' at victoria secrets. OMG!!!
- jessica i need to see that new computer of yours. lol.
- yanira i love you and we need to talk about different shit.
- calihan i miss you too..
- tony hows cali.
- barbie my mom doesn't stop askin' me about you. please call me and talk to her. she wants to kno how your doin'...
- to my puta whores i kno you don't have lj but i love you guys.
- heidio i miss you and i'm (-) this close in flying over there to see you. we need to talk asap. i need to write more letters to you
- life has been treating me good and i'm happy for that. i am HAPPY!
- yea i have stories for everyone. :)
Nov. 28th, 2005 @ 02:11 pm
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| » sarah |
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y: My name is Sarah
I am three,
My eyes are swollen
I cannot see,
I must be stupid
I must be bad,
What else could have made
My daddy so mad?
I wish I were better
I wish I weren`t ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.
I can`t do a wrong
I can`t speak at all
Or else I`m locked up
All day long.
When I`m awake I`m all alone
The house is dark
My folks aren`t home
When my mommy does come home
I'll try `&& be nice,
So maybe I`ll just get
One whippin tonight.
I juss heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie's bar.
I hear him curse
My name is called
I press myself
Against the wall
I try to hide
From his evil eyes
I`m so afraid now
I`m starting to cry
He finds me weeping
Calls me ugly words,
He says it`s my fault
He suffers at work.
He slaps `&& hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
`&& run to the door
He`s already locked it
`&& start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall
I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
`&& my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken,
"I`m sorry!", I scream
But it`s now much too late
His face has been twisted
Into a unimaginable shape
The hurt and the pain
Again and again
Oh please God, have mercy!
Oh please let it end!
And he finally stops
And heads for the door
While I lay there motionless
Brawled on the floor
My name is Sarah
I am three,
tonight my daddy
Murdered me.
And you can help
Sickens me to the soul,
And if you read this
and don't pass it on
I pray for your forgivness
Cause you would have to be
one heartless person
to not be effected
By this Poem
And because you are effected,
Do sumthing about it!
So all I ask you to do
Is pass this on!
IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE!
Oct. 15th, 2005 @ 09:11 am
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happy huricane!!
Sep. 20th, 2005 @ 02:19 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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How sexy is your name?
According to studies, the first letter of your first
name reveals your sexual identity ... What do you
think?
-A-
You are not particularly romantic, but you are
interested in action. You mean business. With you,
what you see is what you get. You have no patience for
flirting and can't be bothered with someone who is
trying to be coy, cute, demure, and subtly enticing.
You are an up front person. When it comes to sex, its
action that counts not obscure hints. Your mate's
physical attractiveness is important to you. You find
the chase and challenge of the "hunt" invigorating.
You are passionate and sexual as well as being much
more adventurous than you appear; however, you do not
go around advertising these qualities. Your physical
needs are your primary concern.
-B-
You give off vibes of lazy sensuality. You enjoy being
romanced, wined, and dined. You are very happy to
receive gifts as an expression of the affection of
your lover. You want to be pampered and know how to
pamper your mate. You are private in your expression
of endearments and particularly when it comes to
lovemaking. You will hold off until everything meets
with your approval. You can control your appetite and
abstain from sex if need be. You require new
sensations and experiences. You are willing to
experiment.
-C-
You are a very social individual, and it is important
to you to have a relationship. You require closeness
and
togetherness. You must be able to talk to your sex
partner before, during, and after. You want the object
of your
affection to be socially acceptable and good looking.
You see your lover as a friend and companion. You are
very sexual and sensual needing someone to appreciate
and almost worship you. When this cannot be achieved,
you have the ability to go for long periods without
sexual activity. You are an expert at controlling your
desires and doing without.
-D-
Once you get it into your head that you want someone,
you move full steam ahead in pursuit. You do not give
up your quest easily. You are nurturing and caring. If
someone has a problem, this turns you on. You are
highly sexual, passionate, loyal, and intense in your
involvement, sometimes possessive and jealous. Sex to
you is a pleasure to be enjoyed. You are stimulated by
the eccentric and unusual, having a free and open.
-E-
Your greatest need is to talk. If your date is not a
good listener, you have trouble relating. A person
must be
intellectually stimulating or you are not interested
sexually. You need a friend for a lover and a
companion for
a bedmate. You hate disharmony and disruption, but you
do enjoy a good argument once in a while it seems to
stir things up. You flirt a lot, for the challenge is
more important than the sexual act for you, but once
you give
your heart away, you are uncompromisingly loyal. When
you don't have a good lover to fall asleep with, you
will fall asleep with a good book. (Sometimes, in
fact, you prefer a good look.)
-F-
You are idealistic and romantic, putting your lover on
a pedestal. You look for the very best mate you can
find. You are a flirt, yet once committed, you are
very loyal. You are sensuous, sexual and privately
passionate. Publicly, you can be showy, extravagant,
and gallant. You are born romantic. Dramatic life
scenes are your favorite fantasy pastime. You can be a
very generous lover.
-G-
You are crap in bed! (Remember....I didn't write
this!!!! LOLOL)
-H-
You seek a mate who can enhance your reputation and
earning ability. You will be very generous to your
lover once you have attained a commitment. Your gifts
are actually an investment in your partner. Before the
commitment, though, you tend to be frugal in your
spending and dating habits and equally cautious in
your sexual involvement. You are a sensual and patient
lover.
-I-
You have a great need to be loved and appreciated...
Even worshipped. You enjoy luxury, sensuality, and
pleasures of the flesh. You look for lovers who know
what they are doing. You are not interested in an
amateur, unless that amateur wants a tutor. You are
fussy and exacting about having your desires
satisfied. You are willing to experiment and try new
modes of sexual expression.You bore easily and thus
require sexual adventure and change. You are more
sensual than sexual, but you are sometimes downright
lustful.
-J-
You are totally fu*king marvelous!
-K-
You can be very romantic, attached to the glamour of
love. Having a partner is of paramount importance to
you. You are free in your expression of love and are
willing to take chances, try new sexual experiences
and partners provided it's all in good taste.Brains
turn you on. You must feel that your partner is
intellectually stimulating otherwise you will find it
difficult to sustain the relationship. You require
loving, cuddling, wining, and dining to know that
you're being appreciated.
-L-
You are very romantic, idealistic, and some how you
believe that to love means to suffer. You wind up
serving your mate or attracting people who have
unusual troubles. You see yourself as your lover's
savior. You are sincere, passionate, lustful, and
dreamy. You can't help falling in love. You really
enjoy stimulating yourself, though you are fairly new
to it. You fantasize and get turned on by movies and
magazines. You do not tell others of this secret life,
nor of your sexual fantasies.
-M-
You are emotional and intense. When involved in a
relationship, you throw your entire being into it.
Nothing
stops you; there are no holds barred. You are all
consuming and crave someone who is equally passionate
and intense. You are willing to try anything and
everything. Your supply of sexual energy is
inexhaustible. You are very social and sensual; you
enjoy flirting and also enjoy mothering your mate.
-N-
You need constant stimulation because you bore
quickly. You can handle more than one relationship at
a
time with ease. You believe in total sexual freedom.
You are willing to try anything and everything. Your
supply of sexual energy is inexhaustible. You are a
flirt yet once committed, you are very loyal. You are
sensuous, sexual, and privately passionate. Publicly,
you can be showy, extravagant, and gallant. You are
born romantic. Dramatic love scenes are your favorite
fantasy pastime. You can be a very generous lover.
-O-
You are very interested in sexual activities yet
secretive and shy about your desires. You can
re-channel much of your sexual energy into making
money and/or seeking power. You can easily have
extended periods of celibacy. You are a passionate,
compassionate, sexual lover, requiring the same
qualities from your mate. Sex is serious business;
thus you demand intensity and diversity, and are
willing to try anything or anyone. Sometimes your
passions turn to possessiveness, which must be kept in
check.
-P-
You are very conscious of social proprieties. You
wouldn't think of doing anything that might harm your
image or
reputation. Appearances count, therefore, you require
a good-looking partner. You also require an
intelligent
partner. Oddly enough, you may view your partner as
your enemy; A good fight stimulates those sex vibes.
You are relatively free of sexual hang-ups. You are
willing to experiment and try new ways of doing
things. You are very social and sensual; you enjoy
flirting and need a good deal of physical
gratification.
-Q-
You require constant activity and stimulation. You
have tremendous physical energy. It is not easy for a
partner to keep up with you, sexually or otherwise.
You are an enthusiastic lover and tend to be attracted
to people of
other ethnic groups. You need romance, hearts and
flowers, and lots of conversation to turn you on and
keep you going.
-R-
You are a no-nonsense, action-oriented individual. You
need someone who can keep pace with you and who is
your intellectual equal the smarter the better. You
are turned on more quickly by a great mind than by a
great body. However, physical attractiveness is very
important to you. You have to be proud of your
partner. You are privately very sexy, but you do not
brag, you are willing to serve as teacher. Sex is
important; you can be a very demanding playmate.
-S-
You are secretive, self-contained, and shy. You are
very sexy, sensual, and passionate, but you do not let
on to
this. Only in intimate privacy will this part of your
nature reveal itself. When it gets down to the
nitty-gritty, you
are an expert. You know all the little tricks of the
trade, can play any role or any game, and take your
love life very seriously. You don't fool around. You
have the patience to wait for the right person to come
along.
-T-
You are very sensitive, private, and sexually passive;
you like a partner who takes the lead. Music, soft
lights and
romantic thoughts turn you on. You fantasize, but do
not tend to fall in and out of love easily When in
love, you
are romantic, idealistic, mushy, and extremely
intense. You enjoy having your senses and your
feelings stimulated,
titillated, and teased. You are a great flirt. You can
make your relationships fit your dreams, oftentimes
all in your
own head.
-U-
You are enthusiastic and idealistic when in love. When
not in love, you are in love with love, always looking
for
someone to adore. You see romance as a challenge. You
are a roamer and need adventure, excitement, and
freedom. You deal in potential relationships. You
enjoy giving gifts and enjoy seeing your mate looking
good. Your sex drive is strong and you desire instant
ratification. You are willing to put your partner's
pleasures above your own.
-V-
You are individualistic, and you need freedom, space,
and excitement. You wait until you know someone well
before committing yourself. Knowing someone means
psyching him out. You feel a need to get into his head
to see what makes him tick. You are attracted to
encentric types. Often there is an age difference
between you and your lover. You respond to danger,
thrills, and suspense. The gay scene turns you on,
even though you yourself may not be a participant.
-W-
You are very proud, determined, and you refuse to take
no for an answer when pursuing love. Your ego is at
stake. You are romantic, idealistic, and often in love
with love itself, not seeing your partner as he or she
really is. You feel deeply and throw all of yourself
into your relationships. Nothing is too good for your
lover. You enjoy
playing love games.
-X-
You need constant stimulation because you bore
quickly. You can handle more than one relationship at
a time with ease. You can't shut off your mind. You
talk while you make love. You can have the greatest
love affairs all by yourself, in your own head.
-Y-
You are sexual, sensual, and very independent. If you
can't have it your way, you will forget the whole
thing. You want to control your relationships, which
doesn't always work out too well. You respond to
physical stimulation, enjoy necking and spending hours
just touching, feeling and exploring. However, if you
can spend your time making money, you will give up the
pleasures of the flesh for the moment. You need to
prove to yourself and your partner what a great lover
you are. You want feedback on your performance. You
are an open, stimulating and romantic
-Z-
Sorry, there was no "Z" in this transmission. Catching
"Z's" no doubt
Sep. 18th, 2005 @ 11:34 pm
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people must go to that party if you can please go, it would be lots of fuckin' fun...
Sep. 16th, 2005 @ 01:53 pm
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I THOUGHT THIS WAS AND STILL IS AWESOME AND BEAUTIFUL INSIDE... it was a random day wasn't planing on it happening but it did...
its sooooo beautiful inside, i love it...
Sep. 14th, 2005 @ 09:15 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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ENJOY.....
Sep. 14th, 2005 @ 08:30 pm
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| » party on Friday Sept 16 |
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must go party!!
call me for further info.
Sep. 12th, 2005 @ 07:13 pm
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| » music of the week: |
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all right, from now on every wednesday i will be posting cds to jam to and the special oldies song that you can listen on forever. prepare yourself cuz i kno a lot. and it all deals with what song of cd i just can't stop listening too. bwahahahahaha. the evilness begin...
BREAKS - Electro Breakz Volume 6 - Return :have to here the whole cd.
OLDIES - you are the woman - BY: Firefall
or something - BY: The Beatles
JAM - LOSE CONTROL - Missy Elliot & Fat Man Scoop
POP - New Deep - John MAyer
INDIE POP - Drop Kick Punks - The Faint
Folk - The First Day of My Life - Bright Eyes
And For those who want to RELATE - THE JOKER BY: Steve Miller
THANK YOU FOR COMING TO COOKIE'S PLACE OF MUSIC TIME/FUN....
ENJOY!
Sep. 7th, 2005 @ 09:45 pm
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i'm feeling better from the accident. less shakin now. lol. the people from my insurance took my car away. thank god they did cuz now i don't have to see it and cry. lately one of my tooths have been hurting and i don't know why. w/e.
-heidio i'm sorry i haven't written yet but writing hurts my arm/fingers/fore arm/muscles. lol.. i will star to write soon no doubt ok. love you.
-louis your gonna get music from a whole shit load. question do you like oldies music? if so let me kno cuz i can defenatly throw good music your way.
-yanira thank you for the beach today. i did get a nice lil tan. gonna get better tomorrow. 16 hot 2 if we were's. lol.
-jason i want to know when you come down so i can give you a BIG HUG.
-barbs i don't want you to leave.
-jessica can't wait for tomorrow. SPARKY.
-georgie i need to get you drunk again. lol.
-gis i miss you too fuckin' much.
-george i miss you. i glad the text made your day. :)
-vanise i NEED to see you asap.
-natalie need to see you bad also cuz you need a hug.
-tony i want to go to cali for a week so you can teach me how to surf.
-alex i heard your coming home soon can't wait to see you.
... love you all...
Aug. 13th, 2005 @ 05:05 pm
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| » info on accident... |
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Usually time takes its time no pun intended. But if you think back to when you were in high school some of the times you can not remember for the simple fact that it went to fast. Only the good and bad times people seem to remember through out their lives. Interesting thing isn’t it. That some people can not remember what happened to them last week unless it was special. Like my memory, I try to keep more good memories then sad memories it would jut depress me even more. Like what happened to me this Tuesday I got into a car accident. Sucks! But hey that stupid bitch took the stop sign, she was just a few inches away from my door. Luckily that it wasn’t my door cause right now I wouldn’t be here typing this, I would be in the hospital with cuts and more shit that I don’t even want to think of. ::cries:: this would be an experience that I would never forget. It hurts to say but I’m glad I’m typing this with burns on my arm then in the hospital with more things that I don’t even want to know. The burns on my right arm are healing, if wanting to know. I’m just gonna get a nice scar on the bottom of my right arm. Stupid air bag. Oh yea I no longer have car cause it’s totaled, just like my brothers car. But mines doesn’t look as bad as his though but she hit a part that said bye, bye to my precious car. ::tear::. This fucking shit sucks ass. My independence is once again lost. I wonder what kind of car would I get next. I want a convertible mini cooper, in orange and black top. But I just don’t know what can I afford for my next car. I wasn’t bothering to save money for a new car cause my car was perfectly fine, nothing was wrong with it. Damn stupid lady for taking that damn stop sign a block away from my freaking house. W/e it happened for a reason. I’m guessing a lesson or santeria. I have no clue but its something. To all when driving, "its is not you driving its everyone else."
click this to see me and my car
Aug. 6th, 2005 @ 02:24 pm
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